Okay, this might get your Feminist hackles up here, but remember, you’re reading this, and my other articles, because your love life isn’t what you want it to be.

First, let me say that a man wants to be with a woman he respects. That is when he’s looking for long term. Short term, he’s not always that fussy. Real short term? Put a sack over her head and… well, you know.

Okay, back to my point. Men love confident, capable women. They want to be proud of who you are. But when you try to impress him, you’re in your masculine energy. At the early stage of dating, he doesn’t want to be impressed, he wants to be dazzled.

First and foremost, men need to be attracted to you physically. He needs to be able to ‘get it up,’ and you owning your own home, your university degree(s), and your impressive job will not do that for him.

Don’t be afraid to talk about your home, your education and your job. But do so as the revealing of who you are. Men enjoy a mystery, the slow ‘undressing’ of your different facets and attributes. The moment you ‘try’ to impress him with your accomplishments, your energy is competitive and masculine. That is a turn off. Dueling penises will not dazzle him.

Feminine Grace, which is the cornerstone of everything I teach and introduce in Men Made Easy, is all about staying aware of, and keeping a beautiful balance between your feminine energy and his masculine. Sure, you have masculine energy and he has feminine energy. But if you are looking for a masculine man, you need to allow him to be just that, masculine.

Women complain that they shouldn’t have to be less than who they are in order to be with a man. This is NOT what I’m telling you to do. I’m simply telling you that the best way to truly enjoy a man is to be in your feminine energy. Learning to develop and use your Feminine Grace is the very best way to do that. Plus, most of the things that turn a man off is when you do things that are what I call ‘ugly.’ Learning Feminine Grace helps you become aware of all the ways that we women can unknowingly ‘go ugly.’

If you don’t like this idea, then you’re probably attached to your masculine, achievement energy and all I can say is good luck finding a man who will love you in such a way that you feel truly fulfilled. In my many years of working with women and couples, I’ve learned that the only way that kind of love can grow is when a woman surrenders to his masculine energy by being empowered and confident enough to surrender to her feminine energy. Feminine Grace is how to do that.

If you want to know the difference between a Caveman, a Dog and a Prince, you can download my 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.

Have you ever been interested in, or worse, in love with a man and he leaves for no apparent reason? Maybe it’s because you’re a High Maintenance woman and don’t realize it.

Men are ever-watchful to avoid getting involved with high maintenance women. Let me explain why it’s one of the worst things you can do if you want a man to fall in love with you and STAY in love.

You’ve heard of high maintenance women but do you know what that means? Hopefully, after I explain this sad malady, you’ll cleanse any HM behavior you might be doing without realizing it so you no longer scare men off.

A high maintenance woman needs everything to be just right.  For example, she’s extremely particular what restaurant she needs to be taken to, then what table she needs to sit at and needs her food prepared just so.

With all those needs, she’s going to point out when things aren’t right. Most men won’t go on a second date with this kind of woman because it doesn’t feel good to be around her. NOTE: Bottom line, men want to be with a woman who makes him feel good. But some women keep this behavior under tight wraps at first, trying to put their best stiletto forward. But when her needs are this extreme, they squish out eventually, and often in some pretty ugly ways.

That’s when the guy starts heading for the door. It’s pretty obvious to spot this kind of woman and even more obvious why a man would not want to get involved with her. Even her women friends can handle only so much of her self-centered behavior.

But what about the Stealth High Maintenance woman? This kind of woman sneaks up on a man, so he doesn’t realize what he’s getting himself into. All he knows is that he doesn’t feel good to be around her.

So how do you define a SHM woman? She lets her date know in subtle ways that he’s disappointing her. She sighs when she says, “Sure, that restaurant will be just fine.” But he can tell that he’s blowing it, he just doesn’t quite know why. And for a while, he’ll try hard to please her. And the more he’s attracted to her, the harder and longer he’ll try.

But eventually, she wears away at his sense of masculinity. He realizes that she’s a bottomless pit and will never be happy. One of the Secrets about men that I reveal in Men Made Easy is, “If you’re not happy, he’s a failure.” Men hate to fail. I’ve asked many men over the years why they left their wife or girlfriend and what they say, with body language that shows their sense of failure, “I couldn’t make her happy.” Another important thing I teach in this book is the concept of Feminine Grace. A high maintenance woman cannot be gracious because she’s too self-centered.

A high maintenance woman doesn’t get second, or for sure, third dates very often. She doesn’t understand why and neither does he. What’s going on is she’s unaware of the most powerful strategy for getting and keeping a man’s interest.

Do you want to know what that strategy is? Be the reason he feels good, the reason his mood is lighter, the reason he’s happy he’s a man. You have the power to do that. Men Made Easy can teach you how.

If you want to find out if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, you can download three free ebooks at KaraOh.com.

A woman wrote to me concerned that her new boyfriend only texts her and what did I think about that?

Here’s my response to her:

Funny you should ask about this. The man I’m involved with likes to text me. I was not a texter before, but now, I love it. I realized early on that that’s how he likes to communicate with me, so I totally got into it and now I love it. He usually writes several times a day; some information, some fun, some playful, some affectionate.

What I’m trying to tell you is to remember Secret number two: A man wants to be understood and accepted for who he is. Your guy is a texter, not a phoner. What you’re doing is keeping yourself from receiving what he’s offering. YOU are getting in the way of what could build between you. You have an idea that it’s impersonal but that’s just something you’ve made up about it.

Texting will allow you and your new boyfriend to quickly reach out. You can respond right then, if you’re able, or later. But it’s a continuous flow, the thread stays intact, and when you send a text appreciating something about each other, or flirty, you can look back and feel good about it all over again.

As you embrace this form of communication, begin to notice your heart opening up to your guy and his response to this. But here’s a warning, do not use texting to have any kind of serious conversation. That needs to be face-to-face.

If you want to learn all my Secrets about men so you can begin to transform your love life, go to MenMadeEasy.com.

And if you want to know if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, go to KaraOh.com.

Joy Behar, one of the co-hosts on Barbara Walter’s show, The View, was telling a story about her fear of mice. Apparently, she saw one in her house and started screaming, even though she was alone. She locked herself in her room with her dogs and called her partner, I think his name is Steve. Well, Steve came home and did a variety of things to fix the problem, basically taking charge of rescuing his damsel in distress.

Joy said she was really surprised by how turned on to Steve she became; sitting in his lap, flirting, wanting to get it on… like a school girl. This is what I’ve been telling women for years, GIVE A MAN OPPORTUNITIES TO BE YOUR HERO, and both of you win. You get to enjoy the energy of being a woman, and he gets to enjoy being your man.

When you do this with a man you’re getting to know, you’re going to stand out as someone exceptional… because so few women know to do this simple thing. Once you’ve given a man an opportunity to be your hero, your only job is to show him how much you appreciate him. That’s why the title of my book that reeals the Secrets about men is titled, Men Made EASY.

If you want to know if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, you’ll want to download my 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.

I received this story from a friend who generally sends me really great jokes. So it was a surprise to find myself starting to cry at the sweetness of this story. I’ve noticed I treat old people differently now; more patient, more helpful, more willing to talk and make them feel important. And I notice I always end an interaction hoping they have someone at home who loves them. I hope you enjoy this as much as I and my friends have. Please send your friends who would enjoy it to this page.

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The Wooden Bowl

I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.

The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather’s shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.  ‘We must do something about father,’ said the son. ‘I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.’

So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl

When the family glanced in Grandfather’s direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone.
Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped  a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor.

He asked the child sweetly, ‘What are you making?’ Just as sweetly, the boy responded, ‘Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up.’ The four-year-old smiled and  went back to work.

The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.

That evening the husband took Grandfather’s hand and  gently  led him back to the family table.

For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

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Inspiration to open your heart to life and to love:

• I’ve learned that, no matter what happens, how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
• I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things: a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
• I’ve learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life
• I’ve learned that making a ‘living’ is not the same thing as making a ‘life..’
• I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
• I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.
• I’ve learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you But,  if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you
• I’ve learned that whenever I decide  something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
• I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.
• I’ve learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.
• People love that human touch — holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
• I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.
• I’ve l earned that you should pass this on to everyone you care about I just did.

Ann Marie Lapointe

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Anything that causes our hearts to open and feel deeply is a gift to our joy and well-being. And when we’re in a state of love, everyone in our lives benefits.

Anything that makes us happier and smile more, makes us more attractive to men. To learn all my Secrets about men, you’ll definitely want to get your copy of Men Made Easy now.

And if you wonder if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, get my 3 free ebooks and find out at KaraOh.com.

If you find men not paying much attention to you lately, it might not be you, it might be money worries.

With what is going on in the economy men tend to go inward when they are concerned about their finances or their jobs. They aren’t thinking about dating other than maybe to get laid, which relieves them of the worry for a short time.

Even though you’re worried as well, men take it as a jolt against their manhood. It’s not personal because they really can’t see you when their mind is filled with concerns about their future and their financial world.

When you do find yourself in a conversation with a man, keep this in mind, be gentle and understanding, and open to just listening, because it might be exactly what will cause him to come out of his fog and really notice that you are someone special.

If you want to know the 12 Secrets about men that will cause him to see you like no other woman he’s ever met, you’ll want Men Made Easy, right now.

And if you want to know if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince, or all three, you can download my 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.

I often get requests for advice from women who tell me how wonderful their man is. Then they go into all the things that make them unhappy. If this sounds like you, I would invited you to do an exercise that can be very revealing. On a piece of paper draw a line down the middle from top to bottom. On the left put the things about him that ARE wonderful and the things he does that make you happy. On the right put the things that are NOT wonderful and make you unhappy.

NOTE: If you’ve been reading my articles, then you know that I firmly believe that NO ONE can MAKE you unhappy. Only you can do that by how you respond to situations and what others do. You can also make yourself happy, by how you look at life. A positive, grateful attitude and perspective will cause you to be happy.

When you do the above exercise, you can see in black and white, a clearer picture of who a man is and if he is what you want. It is not your job to try to change a man’s character or personality. You can change surface things, like how he cuts his hair, whether or not he has a beard, or getting him to wear cowboy boots because you think they’re sexy. But just as you are responsible for your own happiness, you are NOT responsible for his.

On another note, you should never make excuses for his character. He’s either someone you trust, admire and respect, or he’s not. If not, ask yourself why you are with him? Dating is about discovering who a man is, not trying to create a relationship. Once you are clear that a man has all the qualities that you need in a partner, THEN you start forming a relationship.

If you want to become very clear about what kind of man you want, and at the same time, stop wasting your time on the wrong kind of man, you absolutely need to get Avoid The Bad Boys. It will open you eyes like nothing else can.

And if you want to discover if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, download my 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.

Women are the leaders in the relationship. Men know it better than women do. A woman can change the tone and energy more easily then they realize… and it’s fun to watch a man respond.

The quickest way to shift the energy in the moment–and as the primary way you interact with each other–is to remember that beneath the surface, down in his and your hearts, is a desire to be loved, accepted and appreciated.

If you open your heart for a moment, let go of the hurt and resentment, and imagine loving energy being exchanged between you, you will instantly shatter any negative feelings. That’s because it’s not possible to hold love in your heart at the same time you’re feeling anything negative. If you choose not to do this, I would invite you to look at why. That would be a good topic for coaching.

Here are 5 fun and easy ways to instantly improve your relationship:

1) Instead of complaining, whining, or raising your voice, speak softly with clear, concise, respectful, gracious, beautiful and loving language.

How do you do that? Before you “react” stop for however long you need in order to calm yourself.  Walk away, explaining that you need to collect your thoughts before continuing. Remind yourself that you love each other, open your heart to his, and allow those negative feelings to dissipate.

Next, plan what you want to say. Sometimes I even write down what I need to communicate so I remember what I need to say. Then, when it’s time to talk about it, I ask that I be allowed to finish before he speaks. You’ll be surprised how well this works. He’ll stay open to what you need to say, you’ll be heard, and if you continue throughout the conversation as two people who love each other your relationship will begin to blossom.

And don’t start out with, “We need to talk.” That strikes fear into the heart of every man. Instead, ask, “I need your help with something. Do you have time for me to share?” Big difference because men like to help solve problems for the woman they love.

~ The benefit to you? You will get his attention, his cooperation, and his respect.

~ Why does it work? Men need clear, concise, unemotional language to be able to hear you. Otherwise, they shut you out completely. And we all know how good they can be at doing that.

2) Look for ways he makes you happy and let him know… regularly. Some examples might be: “It makes me happy that you like solving problems for me,” or, “You make me feel wonderful when you tell me you love me,” or, “It makes me happy that you help with the kids…and they love it.” One of the chapters in my book, Men Made Easy is titled: “Why Men Are Driven To Make Women Happy.” Letting him know you’re happy makes him feel successful. He needs that and you can give it to him.

~ The benefit to you? He’ll start looking for more ways to make you happy.

~ Why does it work? If you’re not happy he feels like a failure and men hate to fail.

3) Appreciate him often, especially for his masculine qualities and those things you know he likes about himself, things he’s proud of.

Examples could be: “I really appreciate what a nice home you’ve been able to give us. I don’t think I tell you enough,” or, “I love how strong you are. I like watching you work,” or, “The way you make love to me is so perfect, mmmmmm.”

~ The benefit to you? He’ll fall in love each time you do it and you’ll make him feel like a hero. (The last secret in Men Made Easy is “A man wants to be with a woman who makes him feel like a man.”)

~ Why does it work? Men compete with other men and need to measure up. You can validate his worth as a man.

4) Give him romantic kisses instead of pecks. Long hello kisses tell him you’re glad to see him, long good-bye kisses tell him you can’t wait until he returns, long thank-you kisses tell him you really appreciate what he did for you, and “hey you, kiss me” kisses tell him you want him.

~ The benefit to you? He’ll feel more connected to you and look forward to being with you.

~ Why does it work? Physical connection is the only way most men know how to be intimate and physical intimacy is what makes your relationship special from all other relationships.

5) Flirt with him. Be playful, tease him, say slightly naughty things once in a while, and gaze into his eyes with a “come here, big boy” twinkle.

Why do we think we can quit doing the things we did when we were first falling in love? The relationships that endure are those where the couple stays “in love” and have fun together. That means flirting, being playful, being sexy and sensual, and remembering why we fell in love in the first place.

~ The benefit to you? You’ll both feel younger, friskier, and more in love and you won’t end up in divorce court.

~ Why does it work? Flirting is a kind of play and playfulness helps cement your bond.

If you do all these things on a regular basis, you can repair a lot of damage and bring back the in-love sparkles. You can look at this as work or you can look it as fun. It’s all in your desire and your attitude. Remember, you’re the engine that runs the relationship.

To learn all my Secrets about men, and how to use them go to MenMadeEasy.com.

And to discover if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince, or all three, download 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.

I think I understand where “warm-fuzzies” came from.

I am just finishing “Marley & Me” and each time I pick it up, I cry deep, heartfelt tears. If you ever struggle with finding your daily heart connection here’s a bit from John Grogan’s book: “Was it possible for a dog––any dog, but especially a nutty, wildly uncontrollable one like ours––to point humans to the things that really matter in life? I believe it was. Loyalty. Courage. Devotion. Simplicity. Joy. And the things that did not matter, too. A dog has no use for fancy cars or big homes or designer clothes. Status symbols mean nothing to him. A water-logged stick will do just fine. A dog judges others not by their color or creed or class but by who they are inside. A dog doesn’t care if you are rich or poor, educated or illiterate, clever or dull. Give him your heart and he will give you his.”

After writing about the death of Marley in his newspaper column Mr. Grogan received over 800 emails responding with deeply touched hearts. This one, from Elaine, touched my heart the most: “Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it waiting for us to come home each day. It is amazing how much love and laughter they bring into our lives and even how much closer we become with each other because of them.”

If you are dating and searching for Ms. or Mr. Right, I recommend you borrow or rent a puppy.

Take it out where there will be lots of people, and watch how easily fears, insecurities and judgments just float away.

People will come up to you, smile, share their joy and connect their hearts to yours, if only for those brief furry moments that you bask in the pure, unadulterated sweetness of an innocent puppy.

You don’t even have to like animals to fall under the spell of a puppy. But if you don’t like animals, you might want to take a look at what that’s about. I suspect there’s a “Heart Condition” needing a little T.L.C.

I teach twelve secrets about men that can help you finally be able to create a relationship based on true and enduring love. Learn how at MenMadeEasy.com.

Find out he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three at KaraOh.com.

I am a huge proponent of feeling all of your emotions, fully and completely. That’s one of the many joys of being human and female. BUT, there is an overarching emotion that runs your life. Are you positive or negative? Do you notice what’s good in your life, or do you put your emphasis on what’s not working?

How well your life works has to do with where you put your focus. This article came out of a conversation about blamers and people whose habitual perspective is to see the world through the filter of “The Cup Is Half Empty,” or “Look At What’s Wrong With the World,” or “You Know What’s Really Sad?”, etc.

My personal preference is to see “The Cup Is Overflowing.” And, in my life, that’s exactly what I get. Not that icky things don’t happen. But even when they do, I embrace them because that means I will learn a lesson, and come out the other end a happier, wiser woman with even greater capacity to love and be loved. I am living proof that this philosophy works.

Another piece of my personal philosophy is, “Everything that’s happening is supposed to be happening, or it wouldn’t be happening.” It’s my way of accepting what is so I don’t get tossed around by life. We ALL make choices every moment of every day. Our perspective is one of those many choices and it will absolutely color EVERYTHING we see and interpret.

If you want to start experiencing more love in your life, you absolutely need to learn to use my 12 Secrets about men. You can order this essential relationship enhancing program at MenMadeEasy.com.

And if you want to find out if he’s a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince or all three, you can order 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.