I’ve been having fun on Facebook and have gotten to know some very interesting people. When looking around for “friends” to connect with, I’m fascinated to see what poses and attire some women choose for their photos. I’d love to write to them to ask if they are looking for nookie and not friends. If I was a man, I would not think of anything other than nookie.

This idea of what message a woman is sending got me to thinking that I should say something to you about what to wear on a date.

So here are: 3 Ways To Send The Right Message With Your Appearance

1) If you’re looking for someone to marry or create a long-term relationship with, you need to wear something that is flattering and shows off the best aspects of your figure, but without doing anything suggestive. Don’t wear anything that shows cleavage. I’m sorry but the message gets clouded when you’re being blatantly s•e•x•ual. And even the most gentlemanly man will be distracted. Besides, you don’t want a man to date your bre*asts, you want him to date you, the person within.

2) Don’t be too perfectly put together or over the top. The more extreme your attire the more you narrow the number of men who will find you attractive. If you’re over 35, you’re already dealing with a dwindling number of men who will be interested, simply because you are over 35. So dress flattering but relaxed, feminine, soft, pretty. That doesn’t mean ruffles and lace, just be more unstructured. Especially don’t wear business attire. He’s learned to ignore that the women he works with are female so don’t look like what he deals with professionally.

3) Don’t be extreme in your hair and make-up. If you wear your hair teased and sprayed, in any kind of a severe style or cut, you are, once again, narrowing the field of possibilities. Keep your hair soft and touchable and your cut flattering and feminine. I used to have ultra short hair and everyone said I looked great in it. It was flattering but severe, striking but not enticing.

The same goes for make-up. The more extreme, the fewer men will be interested. So keep your eye shadow neutral, no blue or purple, certainly not that awful pink that makes a woman look ill. Keep the rouge a natural glow and your lipstick flattering but not too red. Everything should be kissable, not scary. And gloss should not be used or at least, kept at a minimum. Most men say they don’t want to get near that “gook” as they call it.

If you’re not sure about how you put yourself together, ask a friend or hire a wardrobe consultant. You want to look as fresh, youthful but age-appropriate, natural, and as fun as possible. If you’ve gotten in the habit of dressing over the top or at the other end, matronly, it’s time for an intervention.

From my heart to yours,

The Heart Whisperer™

The Heart Whisperer™

The Heart Whisperer™

Kara Oh
The School Of Charm, Seduction and Feminine Grace: FeminineGrace.com
Start dating smart: DateSmartWinHisHeart.com
Learn all about men: Men Made Easy
All about dating: SecretsToDatingSuccess.com