Should you get him something for Valentine’s Day?

It depends on what stage you’re at. If you’re an established couple, certainly. But men are not usually into the romantic stuff so if you do give him something, make it sexy or fun. If you go for romance, you’re doing it more for you than for him. Not the way to buy any gift.

If you’re a new couple and he hasn’t shared how he feels about you yet, it’s best to keep it very, very low profile. You don’t want to scare him off. I don’t think you should give him anything, but if you just “can’t help yourself,” give him a fun/funny card, nothing mushy. And don’t give him anything else because if he doesn’t give you something, you’re going go have a very awkward moment.

If you’re further along and you’re a couple, or married, for any effort he emakes, be uber-appreciative, even if you’re disappointed. Your disappointment comes from expectations, which almost always bite you in the butt. He’s going to be trying to figure out what will please you, but if you haven’t given him any clue what that might be (you should never make a man guess), then he’s a bit scared he’s going to mess up. So he’s usually stumbling in the dark.

Valentine’s Day is filled with emotional gunk that mostly gets in the way of a couple just enjoying each other and sharing whatever level of affection they’re at. So let it all go, enjoy and be thrilled with whatever effort me makes. If he does nothing, it’s either because it’s too soon and he doesn’t want to give you the wrong message, you’ve never let him know what you want, or, if you have told him what you’d like, then he’s just insensitive. If that’s the case, and you’re still deciding to continue seeing him? Duh!

From my heart to yours,

The Heart Whisperer™